Woman seeking lost twin brother's grave calls for apology

Mary Hart was born in Stourbridge in 1954, tragically her brother, John, died during the birth and his body was immediately taken by the authorities for burial.

Shockingly, it was common practice at the time for babies’ bodies to be either buried in mass graves or alongside a stranger who was being buried on the same day in a local cemetery.

Mary, aged 69, said: “I’m not certain who was responsible for the policy developed, if there was such a thing, to tell mothers their babies were buried with a woman. Whoever it was needs to apologise.

“I do think it is vital for mothers still alive to know the truth.

“I think siblings could and should be included in an apology as it affected whole families.”

It was common practice at the time for babies to be taken from their mothers before they had a chance to bond.

Speaking in the House of Commons in 2020, MP Nadine Dorries said: “Until the 1980s and 1990s, bereaved families of stillborn children were kept in the dark by doctors and midwives, ostensibly for their own protection.

“It was assumed that if a mother or father was allowed to see their stillborn baby and establish any kind of connection with it, this would only prolong and worsen their grief.”

Often records of where children were, were not kept or have been lost, in some cases, mothers were told their child was buried with a woman when in fact they were buried in a mass grave with other babies.

Mary Hart said: “It’s the lies told that are hard to live with and to find out there is no record of the baby you carried and lost after nine precious months is a travesty.

“It is our story. What happened to him happened to us both. I’ve spent 70 years without him. I feel I deserve to know what happened, to know the truth.”

Mary was just two-and-a-half pounds at birth and clung to life while John, who weighed seven pounds, passed away and was taken to an undertaker in Stourbridge, the family was told he was buried with a woman in Stourbridge.

Mary Hart as a baby with her family including her sister

Mary’s search for answers goes on while she continues to grieve for the twin brother she never knew.

She said: “I was so angry at him leaving me to face the traumas of life as his little sister. He was the one who should have survived.

“I know there is a big empty void not knowing where he is. I can theorise around it all and say it doesn’t matter especially now I’m almost 70 but emotionally it really does.”

Neither the undertaker or Dudley Council has been able to find any records of the burial.

The mother-of-two from Solihull said: “I also tried to verify the truth regarding my own birth but learned that my early records up to the age of 21 were lost.”

Mary has found support with The Lost Twin Network and from campaigner Gina Jacobs from Wirral in Liverpool who has discovered mass graves containing up to 90 children.

Tragically, in some cases fathers were asked to take their stillborn children for burial in a cardboard box tied up with string.

The case was raised on May 1 in the House of Commons by Wirral MP Margaret Greenwood who asked Rishi Sunak if the government would apologise on behalf of previous governments.

The Prime Minister did not apologise but paid tribute to Gina Jacobs, who he said she “deserves nothing but our praise and admiration and I’m so pleased she’s brought comfort to so many other people too.”

Stuart Connelly, head of bereavement services at Dudley Council, said: “This is an extremely sad and tragic situation, and we will of course do everything we can to help.

“Our records do date back to the 1950s but unfortunately, we have no record of this burial at Stourbridge cemetery from the information we have.”